As you well know, I always look good. I always have on makeup and I never have a bad hair day. My clothes are always highly fashionable and well-accessorized. I never have fat days. And drinking wine never makes my hands and feet swell. And I'm always in a good mood and never crabby. And my hiney always looks skinny. I never take a bad picture because I'm so extremely photogenic. Seriously, I should be a super-model.
So, being the picture of perfection that I am, it is extremely difficult to show you these next pictures. But I'm all - ALL - about being honest. Honestly. When it comes to being realistic, I guess I should be a role model or something.
We're all friends here, right? I'm pretty sure you won't take me off the pedestal. Or knock me off. Or use a crane and a wrecking ball to remove me. From the pedestal.
So . . . observe the real me. Preserved for all eternity by Lisa, who took the pictures at the surprise party. You may need a glass of wine before you start.
Hi Karenpie. Aren't you glad you were chewing gum before you walked into the surprise?
Because I firmly believe the gum detracts from my double chin.
Oh. Oh dear. Where did the gum go? It was the best part of the pictures.
And finally . . . .
The lovely, gracious, gentle face of surprise.
The super models are runnin' scared now.